Four of the Five Beasts Are Out of Stock
No Face Sheep, Richard Ham, Goat 061 and Pepper Cow. Only the bee is available, and it is the least popular.
- Subject
- Retail
- Published
- 2026-04-09
The five named beasts of Diddly Squat exist as nineteen-pound soft toys: No Face Sheep, Richard Ham the pig, Goat 061, Pepper Cow and the bee.
Four of the five are out of stock and have been for most of a year. Richard Ham has fourteen reviews, which for a nineteen-pound plush pig is an extraordinary number and represents a small fraction of the people who have wanted one and found it unavailable.
What the farm has accidentally built here is a working character taxonomy — named animals with established personalities and demonstrated commercial pull. Brands spend millions trying to create that and mostly end up with a mascot nobody believes in.
And we keep running out. It is the clearest operational failure in the shop and it is entirely of our own making.
Subject
Retail
Published
2026-04-09
Written by
Somebody who was there
Free
No paywall, no account
One email a fortnight.
Everything published here, plus what is happening in the fields.
What people actually ask.
The two questions this page gets most, answered without a support ticket.
It is written for the estate, from the fields rather than from a desk, and it argues rather than announces.
Enthusiastically. Bothering Us goes to a person, not a queue.
Everything on this site is a demonstration build. The pages are real, the words are ours, and the checkout takes no money.
The rules that apply to this.
/lawyering/terms/
/lawyering/privacy/
/lawyering/cookies/
/lawyering/contact/
